Comments on: The Hood

By: Alice

Alice — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 11:07:27 +0000

I wanted to thank you for your website. I just stumbled onto it a few minutes ago. I am a 25 year old woman with Asperger’s Syndrome and a few other things. (Though I overlap into a few categories, I am only officially AS.) I found your thoughts insightful and gracious. Thank you for posting.

By: john

john — Sun, 17 May 2009 21:15:04 +0000

I just wrote about school issues with my son on my blog. My son also loved his hood up, I never really thought about it until you wrote your post.

By: Joanie

Joanie — Wed, 13 May 2009 00:18:53 +0000

Oh, my. I know just how that feels, too. The way you write about it is a beautiful thing. You’ve captured those feelings so well. It is so hard when we can’t fight those battles for them. It is such a helpless feeling. Nigel is lucky to have such a wonderful and caring mom. Thank you for sharing. It really helps to know we are not alone in these experiences.

By: jess

jess — Tue, 12 May 2009 22:40:41 +0000

i know that hurt, that completely encompassing anger.

i’m so sorry.

hugs.

By: Nicki

Nicki — Tue, 12 May 2009 20:22:31 +0000

I know, it sucks. Some people are just jerks, and there’s just not much you can do to change it. Hopefully, the good work you do to be an advocate for your son and other kids will mean that they will be surrounded with more nice people and less jerks… but I’m sure there will just always be a few jerks.

By: Tanya Savko

Tanya Savko — Tue, 12 May 2009 06:24:56 +0000

Tera – That presentation sounds amazing. If more people were to experience that, surely it would make a difference. I can’t wait to hear about it!

Michelle S – Unfortunately, the only thing we could write into his IEP would be wearing ear plugs or headphones in the halls, which he refuses to do because he doesn’t want to stand out. They say it wouldn’t be “fair” to the other kids for Nigel to be the only one allowed to have his hood up.

M – I’m not sure yet what he’s picking up on as far as social cliques. Probably more than I realize, but not enough to fit in unfortunately.

Sheri – It’s definitely worse when the “adults” do it! The ignorance!

Carol – Your daughter’s probably right. Most students would never be that way. It’s a shame there are always the few that are.

Sylrayj – Thanks so much for stopping by, and for your kind words.

By: sylrayj

sylrayj — Tue, 12 May 2009 04:17:57 +0000

I was one of the kids the others laughed at. I didn’t have friends, off and on, throughout my childhood. Now, I have a few good friends, and they are steadfast and supportive.

It was tough when I was young, but now I am able to do without, instead of put up with ‘friends’ who belittle me or use me or have values that greatly differ from mine.

I watch my son, following the same sort of path I did, and I see that he’s much like his mommy – no friends, not really, and he does get teased some (it’s a good thing we’re both rather oblivious, because we don’t notice a lot of it). I also see a preteen who isn’t being pressured by ‘buddies’ to grow up too fast, and who can manoeuvre online among good people his parents know, finding his place in the world.

Thank you for caring, thank you for loving so much – thank you for being the biggest support right when it’s needed. Your boy will probably grow up to be a very wonderful man, because he can see what’s right every time he looks at his parents.

By: Carol

Carol — Tue, 12 May 2009 02:21:08 +0000

It IS hurtful. My daughter, who is a few years older than J, used to observe in high school that it was the misfits themselves that made fun of special needs students, etc. She also felt that the majority of the students would never be that way (and she had a very sensitive radar when it came to the well being of kids that were different; partly because of her brother being autistic). But it still hurts.

By: Pweshes Mama

Pweshes Mama — Tue, 12 May 2009 01:50:39 +0000

I’m so sorry you had to go through that and I admire your power to just glare back at the boy.. if it was me, I would’ve probably gone up to him to give a piece of my mind. But of course, people like him aren’t worth the time and effort. I know it’s easier said than done, but after what we go through every day with a special needs child and with how much they teach us, we just hv to remember that ignorant people like that boy are literally just ignorant and in that sense we should actually be feeling sorry for them. Of course, that still doesn’t take away the hurt that we feel. I hope you feel better about it soon.

Ps. Nigel looks absolutely adorable in the pic. He truly is such a handsome boy!

By: Michelle O'Neil

Michelle O'Neil — Mon, 11 May 2009 22:08:33 +0000

Those boys in their disconnection are feeling as fearful as Nigel does. They are trying to hide it. I get that, and I have compassion, but that doesn’t stop the mama in me from wanting to get out of the car and teach them a thing or two. Trust me, they have shitty home lives, no self esteem, no self love at all. They are pathetic.

Keep telling Nigel how beautiful he is.